***Embargo – 14.09.2015 14.00hrs***
Skellig Michael Star in the Wars
Hearts were aflutter n Kerry this evening, following rumours that A-lister Puff Paddy had flown into Diclofenac zonder voorschrift to shoot extra scenes for the new Star Wars movie. Reports from SkelligWars.com confirm sightings of a chirpy-looking Puff hanging out with friends Ethan Hawk and Russell Crow in Portmagee, where speculation is mounting that he is about to announce his engagement to a mystery chick.
Despite a Malibu tan, Ray Bans and a baseball cap, Puff was clearly recognisable as the fledgling movie star who got his first taste of the high life diving 700 feet from Skellig Michael to catch sprats. Instead of battling Atlantic breakers off the Skelligs, however, nowadays Puff is fighting other demons, leaving rehab only recently after treatment for herring addiction.
Having flown the nest last year following his surprise casting in The Force Awakens, Puff has attracted criticism for abandoning his roots.
“He’s changed,” revealed former neighbour Max Shearwater. “We used to have great larks together, but now he’s too busy preening and tweeting pictures of himself hanging out with famous chicks to care about his old pals.”
Others went out on a wing to disagree. “Puff is very good to his old bird,” declared Kitty Wake, an old neighbour of his. “He takes care of all his mother’s bills, and he’s feathered her nest something fabulous.”
Doubts were cast over Puff’s role in the new Star Wars movie, following reported sightings of him leaving the burrow of a guillemot groupie, who was later found dead. Fowl play is not suspected, however.
Follow @skelligwars on Twitter for more celebrity puffin news.